My last post was full of that energy of resolution and gusto, a new year, a new start. And I mean it. This year is going to be a year of reclaiming myself and my spiritual journey. But already I have been to a deeply dark place, a place of untold loneliness and also of emotional shutdown; I have been visiting my cave.<\/p>\n
I’m still in it. I am peeking out at the sun that has arrived, the spring is coming and the crocuses and daffodils have brought colour to the landscape that was wet and windy. But I’m still in my cave and it’s cosy in here, it’s not very comfortable but it feels safe at least.<\/p>\n
I came in here after a raging argument with someone I love, weeks ago, I came in because I did not want to deal with who I became in that moment, I came in to hide from myself and anyone else that might reflect myself back to me. Outwardly, I can see that I am quite jolly and light, surprisingly so, I like that I have got a little better at not being so absorbed with the darkness of my cave that I have forgotten all spirit and love, and yet I know I am still here, sitting, waiting, hoping that something will change things for me, because I don’t want to change them myself.<\/p>\n
I know that I am here, even if I allow myself to forget, because in the moments when people ask ‘how are you?’ I am flummoxed. I have no answer to give. I am not fine, I am not ok, nor am I good or happy or joyful or vibrant, sad or despondent; I am wordless. I would like to reply with a shrug and a humph and sometimes I do. Most often I say I am fine… don’t we all?<\/p>\n
I have slunk into my cave. The Spring is drawing me out…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
My last post was full of that energy of resolution and gusto, a new year, a new start. And I mean it. This year is going to be a year of reclaiming myself and my spiritual journey. But already I have been to a deeply dark place, a place of untold loneliness and also of … Continue reading “Slinking into my Cave”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-196","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-holistic-health-emotional-healing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/196","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=196"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/196\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":198,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/196\/revisions\/198"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=196"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=196"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/soulreflection.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=196"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}