Tag: grace

The King of Knowledge

Sometimes I’m not sure how certain books arrive in my ‘to read’ pile. But I accept their intrusion and, following my own rules, they must be read. 

This is one such mystery: a Hare Krishna commentary.  I have vague memories of the Hare Krishna community hanging out in Kentish Town where I grew up, handing out food, chanting and wearing orange tones. I may well have been palmed it at some point then and it’s taken twenty (plus!) years of house moves and adventures to reach the top of my pile (most books take a year!). 

From wherever it came, the universal timing is all in perfection. As my young teen is reminding me clearly right now, those years are not about absorbing the spiritual aspects of life! I wouldn’t have really resonated with the deeper perspective that I can welcome now, in fact I can quite imagine myself being quite dismissive and derisory about it. 

But now I love reading about different faiths and beliefs. There is so much compassion and love as the foundation and I enjoyed learning much about the world of Hare Krishna. The Bhagavad Gita and Upanishads are still working their way to the top of my pile and it was fascinating to be reading a study of this ancient wisdom, wetting my taste buds for the originals. 

As with most of life, whilst I don’t chant the exact song sheet of this text, there is more that resonates than doesn’t. Faith and love being the core of existence, all the tendrils that flow from that are so nourishing and inspiring. 

And now, instead of remembering a slightly bizarre cult on the streets of my London neighbourhood, I can reframe that memory to one of charity, grace, joy and generosity. Such is the power of knowledge and understanding. 

First published on social media on 26th August 2022

The Zahir

Paulo Coehlo is probably the most significant inspiration for the creation of my writing passion. I adore reading across genre but Coehlo’s work has always spoken directly to me, not always comfortably but necessarily, and how he imparts wisdom and induces questioning is what I aspire to in my own work. 

The Zahir is no exception. It has come to me twice, desperate to be read, waiting patiently to rise to the top of my pile. And here I am, with the spiritual space (bar the near constant requests from the kids!) on our first overseas holiday, after two years of guarding and protecting our freedoms, where I can breathe those anxieties away and reflect on what needs shifting within. 

Coehlo’s characters manage to exemplify those portals into my being which I simultaneously yearn and reject. This book looks at how we carry love through our lives, how we let it stagnate, dwindle or die in ourselves and our relationships, and it pulled me up sharp on numerous occasions. 

I have, by choice, let go of so much of what sparked my soul whilst the dive into parenting set me alive in different ways. But I recognise now that the time has come to rejuvenate those embers, remember who I am outside of meals and school runs and hugs and awe. I want my children to see me alive in ALL ways, I want to model that for them but most of all I need to do that for myself. 

In my mid twenties, pre marriage, pre kids, I can remember so clearly those moments of absolute connection to divine love; holding wide the doors of new opportunities & adventures and recognising the signs and messages from God. 

That has never fully left me, but so many layers of extra have piled on top, most wonderful but plenty unnecessary and stifling too. The Zahir has reminded me of everything important and everything unimportant wrapped up in disguise. 

Love is everything. Letting it flow through me unhampered, just as a baby without a lifetime of stories hindering the energy, that is my focus. Not an overnight transformation but a post-it on my forehead for the rest of my days. 

First published on social media on 23rd August 2022

The Greatest Secret

I love manifesting and I’m pretty good at it, with non attachment ideals. And I also have work to do on my limiting beliefs. I read Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret, a manifesting bible, in the early days of my marriage (I believe it came on honeymoon!) and was interested to read The Greatest Secret, wondering where it would take me next.

Well to a whole other level is the truth of it. And not comfortably so either. Because really I know what she’s saying in this book is absolutely true and I’m also attached to my very human experience of the world so stepping up to this feels daunting. Shall I explain a little more or leave you cryptically dangling?

Succinctly, it’s about remembering our eternal energy that has been in existence forever, that has experienced and knows all. And by remembering we can view and live our human journey with the reassurance of the bigger picture, enabling us to disentangle from dwelling on the challenges as negative rather allowing just what is.

There are moments when I have touched this place and have sat in the flow of awareness and life with blissful appreciation. But I have not sustained that by virtue of being pulled back into one drama, one trigger, or another.

This book is the guide to inhabiting that place more consistently and consciously. It’s a practice that requires consistency and effort to become habit, with the photographed affirmation a clear link to that. I’m not there yet but I have certainly stepped out of some dramas with ease and Grace by utilising the methods prescribed and how wonderful it will be to continue down this trajectory.

I just have to remember to breathe.

First published on social media on 30th May 2022

Days Like These

Some days are like this…. When you break your new juicer by dropping a metal cocktail spoon into it! Or by scratching your car along the column of a tight car park. Or of hearing of the death of a friend from days long gone, but held dear, taken far too young and leaving behind a small child. Ooof some days like these are just too much and too everything and they are just to be borne with as much grace and calm as possible. Which I think is the only thing I did manage to achieve today, but there are still hours before bed for that to go haywire too. It was written in the stars and is the tapestry of life and I can’t wait for tomorrow’s sun to bring a fresh day.

First published on social media on 28th April 2022

The Rockery

My youngest is a do-er. Any task where tools can be utilised, muscles stretched and creative energy unleashed, that’s heaven.

And it welcomes its own journey of negotiation, surrender, guidance and boundaries. Much like most areas of parenting really.

This past week we designed and created a rockery in our garden. Our ideas were not fully aligned. One of the areas of parenting I have struggled with is finding the balance between fully embracing the creative vision of my child, measured against not only my own desires, but actually more the practicality and functionality of these endeavours.

I have learned that leaning fully into their own ideas has so often just led to crushing disappointment as they cannot yet manifest in practical terms. This has its own gifts, and disappointment is not something to shy away from. Counterbalanced by the knowledge that with a little guidance these ideas can create the most glorious of lessons, skills and confidence. The cherry on the top is also respecting my own visions, to model holding my boundaries and not allowing the ego of child to believe themselves too worldly, too early. And then of course there is surrender….

All this in just a few days of moving rocks, planting flowers and scattering stones. All of this everyday as a parent.

When to guide, when to step back and allow, when to stand strong, when to surrender to flow.

These are life lessons for me but the painful edge is that it can feel huge that I am this influencer of principles to real, live humans who are still growing and forming and absorbing it all. The pressure can feel utterly overwhelming until I remember that I’m just human too, that we chose each other from the stars and love is love the world over after all.

So to all you mama’s and papa’s agonising over the most recent battle, the lost moment, the unsaid apology, the what if; I want to offer the words that I comfort myself with.

My work is their work, my lessons are theirs. We are intertwined for this very reason, for this moment in time, for this day of chaos, for this hour of hilarity. All of it is and all of it isn’t. Everything is just as it should be.

Love Hope Faith and Grace.

#parenting #childhood #boundaries #surrender #joy #love #hope #faith #grace #negotiation #guidance #influencer #humans #lessons #asitshouldbe

First Written on Social Media 27 March 2021